With my neck in a noose and my heart beating fast
by spikespetslayer
Summary: Penny takes Sheldon shopping for a suit. Set sometime circa season 3. Rating for language.


_yeah, so recently my wife was in the hospital and it gave me time to think, which gave me time to write. you benefit. the wife was discharged. everyone wins. and like the rest, I don't own the big bang theory, so don't sue me._

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"I hate this."

Penny cringed at the petulant tone of Sheldon's voice, but she held her tongue and didn't comment. She hated taking him shopping, but she really did have to—it was somewhat her fault that he needed new trousers to go with his black suit.

She picked up a blue silk tie that was the color of his eyes and walked over to the dressing room. "Sheldon, try this on with that shirt, okay?"

His long fingers plucked the tie from her and disappeared behind the curtain. "Penny, its only one color!"

"I know, Sheldon. We're going for classy, not clownish."

"But I don't like it—don't they have one with batman or the flash?"

"Sheldon," she said through gritted teeth, "put on the damn tie."

She heard his sigh, and then the rustle of fabric as it slithered against itself. "I look ridiculous, Penny."

"Come out here." Her tone brooked no argument and he stepped through the curtain, looking everywhere but directly at her.

She walked up to him as if he was a dream, her hand extending to touch his collar. The crisp white shirt hugged his torso and the tie brought out the startling blue of his eyes. He looked, in a word, delicious. Penny wanted to growl, but she knew it would be misunderstood, so she smiled instead.

"I think that you look quite dashing, Dr. Cooper." She gave the collar a tug, straightened the tie, and brushed her hands over his chest before letting them drop to her sides. She realized then that she was holding her breath and she drew a deep one, forcing her chest to rise and fall as she stood closer to him than she ever had before. She could feel the heat radiating from his body and she basked in it, letting it warm her gently from the outside in. With a soft smile, she stepped away and looked up into his confused face.

"You look wonderful, Sheldon. If you bought another tie in a different color and a couple more shirts, you'd be set in the power suit department."

He looked over his shoulder at her before disappearing behind the curtain. "Under what assumption are you ascertaining that I require a power suit, Penny? I am neither a businessman nor a salesman, both professions requiring such attire. I see no reason for a suit that will make me appear as something I am not."

"Sheldon, every man needs a power suit."

His voice was muffled by the curtain. "I do not need a power suit. My power is seated in my intellect, not in my clothing."

Exasperated, she pushed the curtain aside and stepped into the changing cubicle, much to Sheldon's shock. She grabbed the tie around his neck with one hand and threw her hand over his mouth before he could squeal. "Shut up, Sheldon," she hissed, and his eyes widened comically before he nodded his head.

She took her hand away and pulled him down to her eye level with the tie still wrapped around her fist. "Your power may be intellectual, but you look like sex on a stick in that suit. With all those old biddies that fawn all over Leonard and him being the tiny troll he is, don't you think that they would have an orgasm when they took a look at you, in this?"

"Penny, it is impossible—"

"I said, shut up." She yanked the tie and it tightened unperceptively around his neck, effectively shutting his mouth. "You look good enough to eat in that suit, Sheldon. What do I have to do to convince you?"

"I am not sure that there is anything that you could do to convince me of such a need, Penny. We have adequate food stores in the united states to prevent the need for cannibalism—"

Penny rolled her eyes. "Oh, for fuck's sake, Sheldon, not like that! You look—fuck, I'll just show you."

She yanked him off-balance and as he teetered on his toes, she took possession of his lips.

She couldn't stop herself. He was so obtuse sometimes.

She devoured his lips, his mouth pliant and lax beneath hers. He tried to pull away at first until his own mind took over, allowing her to explore and taste him at will. She kissed him until they were both breathless, then let him go, backing up against the wall of the dressing room with her hand pressed to her chest.

Neither one could deny the spark between them, nor did they want to. They looked at one another, unspoken feelings in their eyes as they attempted to retain a modicum of propriety.

"I'm—I'm sorry, Sheldon. I shouldn't have done that."

"Apology accepted, Penny. Could you excuse me? I need to change out of this suit if we will be purchasing it, don't you agree?"

She nodded and backed out of the dressing room, her hands still on her chest, feeling her erratic heartbeat. She sat down in one of the chairs outside and willed her breathing to a normal rate, ignoring the dampness in her panties.

Sheldon, on the other hand, pressed his face to the mirror, disregarding his constraint when it came to public places such as this. She had kissed him and he felt no panic, only the thrill of the hormonal rushes that pounded through his system.

It was exhilarating.

He set the suit to one side and replaced it with his usual tee shirts and brown pants. He would buy the suit, as well as anything else that Penny suggested. He would do anything she asked.

Anything to have her kiss him like that again. The thought made him smile.


End file.
